When Christmas Break was nearing it's end, he cried a lot and expressed his feelings about not wanting to go back to school. But on the Monday morning he pulled it together and did fine for the week. Yesterday he cried in the morning and wasn't sure why he was. Then he was happy for the Broncos game, but he cried most of yesterday evening and ended up crying himself to sleep last night.
First thing this morning he was back at it. He said that his stomach hurt, but he also said that he didn't want to go back to school. I had him get ready anyway figuring that he would get it together like he had done the previous week, only that wasn't the case today. I tried a couple of times to convince him to get out of the car at the school, but he broke down into uncontrollable sobs and said that his stomach hurt really bad. I finally caved and took him home where he layed on the couch for a while looking like he had just been to war. After settling down and realizing that he wasn't going to have to go to school for the day he perked back up. But right around dinner time tonight, when he realized that the day was winding down, he started to get sad again. And right now he is once again crying himself to sleep.
I have talked with him about all the aspects of school and he seems to be happy. He isn't having a hard time with friends or recess, he isn't bored with school work, he loves Mrs. Wise and she is nice to him...there is nothing wrong there. He just likes being home so much more...that's what he told me. Which is a good thing, I guess. I am glad that he likes home, but he also needs to be able to go to school without tears and emotional break downs in the car parked in the drop off lane.
As I have prayed today to know what to do to help him, I kept having the impression to not let myself get frustrated with him and definitely not lose my temper with him about this. Even though I don't completely understand why this is so hard for him, I know that he is hurting and sad and he needs to feel loved by me. I will be firm with him tomorrow and let him know that he can't continue to miss school just because he doesn't want to go, but I will do it in a loving way. I'm not sure exactly how I will, so I am counting on some help from my Heavenly Father on what to do and say. Because honestly, if it were 100% up to me and I wanted to be selfish, I would keep him home with me every minute of every day. I don't like having him gone to school, except I know that's what he needs to be doing.
Tonight when I went in to lay day with him, this song (please ignore the random person's video. I couldn't find an MP3 link or even a video with lyrics so this had to do) was playing on his ipod speakers. As I knelt beside his bed scratching his back in a effort to calm him, I cried silent tears right along with him. I love my Jacob Brent.
And here's a random picture of Katelyn baking Reese Peanut Butter cupcakes for treat on Saturday afternoon.
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